Things I Suggest You Avoid Saying to University Students.

1)      So, what can you do with that? (about degree)

I am sorry if I read too much into being asked what my intentions are post university. If you ask me ‘what do you want to do after university?’ I will: kiss you, hug you like a mother-chuffing bear, lick the top of your ear and then tell you exactly what I want to do. If you ask me ‘so what are you going to do with that?’ or ‘what can you do with that?’ I will: cry, question the past two years of my life, doubt my life choices, and then reach into your soul and insult all of your past pets and then scream. My decision to come to university was well thought out, and is stressful enough without the constant doubt- inducing questioning.

                I do what is classed as a joint honours degree, half of which is part of the ‘arts’. I read English and Classical Literature. I know it sounds funny that I read and write for a degree. When my grandparents try to understand what I do with my days they struggle to understand. I KNOW THAT IT SOUNDS FUNNY! But there is a bloody point to it. I can’t walk into a publishing house or a newspaper without a degree and go ‘I like books’ and just suddenly get a job. The University experience has lead me beyond academia. My CV is made up about 90% of things I have achieved whilst at university. Stephen Fry, Boris Johnson, Mary Beard, Oscar Wilde and Karl Marx all read Classics. Paul Simon, Renee Zellweger, Susan Sarandon, Mitt Romney, Steven Spielberg all read English.

                I feel like I sound really defensive whenever people ask me ‘what I can do’ with my degree, and I throw celebrity names at them in a similar style to the t-shirt cannon from the Simpsons. A common follow up conversation from the people who ask the above atrocity is to do with tuition fees. It must come across like students are really reckless and aren’t aware that they are spending thousands on something. We aren’t importing cocaine; we are buying an access route to our career. Could you give us a break?

2)      ‘Ugh, you sound so studenty’/ ‘Oh stop being such a student’

Firstly, I totally understand that sometimes students can sound a bit ‘know-it-all’. But it is also not exclusive to students. I have come across people all of my life that are quite pedantic and have minds that tend to enjoy debating or wind people up (yes, I know that some people don’t do it to wind people up). It makes me want to cry blood when I could say something like ‘this is a nice, yellow flower, isn’t it?’ and I would receive a reply like ‘is it yellow, though? Or just what society wants you to think it is?’ I’m being facetious, yes, but you get my drift.

                University has made me a lot more opinionated. Not in a shove-it-down-your-throat-or-anus way; it is just that I spend a lot of time reading people’s opinions and views and am challenged to present my own. An English Literature essay is marked on original ideas. It can be hard to switch from this analytical mentality when it’s all you have done all term. I’m not on my ‘high horse’, and you can disagree with me. But don’t just call me a ‘student’ like it’s some naughty, malicious thing to be. Many, many people are opinionated beyond student-hood. I don’t understand why I’m so constantly made to question my ‘student identity’. I refuse to accept the mould that some people expect me to fit.